Showing posts with label Funny SMS. Show all posts

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A women find a frog in a trap while playing Golf - Frog grants her three wishes if she releases him from the trap. Funny SMS



Clever Woman

A woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods.
She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap.

The frog said to her, 'If you release me from this trap, I will grant You three wishes.' The woman freed the frog,
and the frog said, 'Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes. Whatever you wish
for, your husband will get ten times more or better!'
The woman said, 'That's okay.'


For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, 'You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis who women will flock to.'


The woman replied, 'That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful woman and he will have eyes only for me.' So, KAZAM-she's the most beautiful woman in the world!  For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world.
The frog said, 'That will make your husband the richest man in the world and he will be ten times richer than you.' okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine.' So, KAZAM-she's the richest woman in the world!


The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered, 'I'd like a mild heart attack.'

Moral of the story: Women are 'CLEVER'. Don't mess with them.





Attention female readers: This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good.
Male readers: Please scroll down.













The man had a heartattack ten times milder than his wife!!!

Moral of the story: Women are really dumb but think they're really smart.
Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show.

Female Readers who are still reading: This again proves that women never listen to anything

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Arrested for laughing! This is from an actual trial in the UK : Funny SMS


A young woman several months pregnxnt boarded a bus.  She noticed a
young man smiling at her she began feeling humiliated on account of her
condition. She changed her seat and he seemed more amused. She moved
again and then on her third move he burst out
laughing..................She had him arrested.

When the case came before the court, the young man was asked why he
acted in such a manner. His reply was: When the lady  boarded the bus I
couldn't help noticing she was pregnant. She first sat under an
advertisement,

which read: 'Coming Soon: The Gold Dust Twins'.
I was even more amused when she changed her seat and went to sit under a
shaving advertisement,

which read: 'William's Stick Did The Trick'.

Then I could not control myself any longer when on the third move she
sat under an advertisement, which read: 'Dunlop Rubber would have
prevented this accident.'

The case was dismissed.........!!!

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The most Dangerous Alphabet? W | Funny SMS


The most Dangerous Alphabet?
W

coz all WORRIES start with "W" Who? Why? What? When? Which? Whom? Where? War! Wine! Whisky! Women!

Most dangerous
WIFE!

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A woman is like Bluetooth...Funny SMS


A woman is like Bluetooth...
You are next to her, she stays connected. You go away, she finds new devices ;)

A man, however, is like wifi... Many devices can connect to him as long as he is not secured :P

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Girls of today... Funny SMS



Boy : Hi
Girl : What?
Boy : How are you?
Girl : Do I know you?
Boy : I'm rich...
Girl : Oh! Hi, My name is Rachel but you can call me "Baby". I'm 19 & I stay in Actonville ,I love short dark
men...especially like you...& I'm glad to meet you. So,
when are we going out?
.
.
.
Boy : No, no, no "Rich" is my name.
Girl : Sorry I don't talk to strangers...!!!haha

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Dont u feel cheated and angry Funny SMS


Dont u feel cheated and angry when u open a bag of chips & its only 30% full...?
Well,
Thats how Boys feel when they unhook a Padded Bra...!!

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160 Words Best Happy Birthday SMS


Best Happy Birthday SMS In 160 Words,Happy Birthday SMS In 160 Words,Birthday SMS In 160 Words,Free Birthday SMS In 160 Words,Best Happy Birthday SMS.

He@rt To He@rt T@lk$,

Wh!$per!ng Tho$e $weet Noth!ng$, &

Your $m!le$ Th@t $@y,

U Luv Me, $weethe@rt ! M $o H@ppy,

V Found E@ch Other,


***** H@PPY B!RTHD@Y MY LUV *****

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Short Funny Birthday Jokes One Liners | Kids Jokes


Funny Birthday Jokes One Liners Kids,Funny Birthday Jokes For Kids,Short Birthday Jokes,Funny One Liner Jokes,Birthday One Liner Jokes,Kids Jokes.

1. Santa: Wh@t’$ The E@$!est W@y To Remember Ur W!fe'$ B!rthday ?

Banta: Forget !t Once.


2. Santa: Why D!d The Boy Feel W@rm On H!$ B!rthday ?

Banta: Bec@use People Kept To@$ting H!m.


3. Santa:  What’$ The Be$t W@y To Get @ M@n To Remember Ur Ann!versary ?

Banta: Get M@rr!ed On H!$ B!rthd@y.


4. A D!plomat !$ @ M@n Who Always$ Remember$ @ Woman’$ B!rthd@y But Never Remembers Her @ge.


5. Santa: Why Couldn’t Preh!$tor!c M@n $end B!rthday C@rd$ ?

Banta: The $tamp$ Kept F@ll!ng Off The Rock$.


6. Santa: Why Do V Put C@ndle$ On Top Of @ B!rthday C@ke ?

Banta: Bec@use !t’$ Too H@rd To Put Them On The Bottom.

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Priceless Date


Priceless Date
ON A HOT DATE
Movie tickets-1500
Dinner-2000
car Fuel-500
coffee- 500
hotel room-5000
& your girlfriend says Shes on Periods
the smile on your face  -  PRICELESS!!

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Relationship between lovers in today's age!!


Relationship between lovers in today's age!!

"You can touch each other.,
but u cannot touch each others mobilez.! :p

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I told her :


I told her :
" I might not be rich, I have no money or villa or cars or companies like my friend Peter, but I love you and adore you.
She looked at me with tears in her eyes and hugged me like there was no tomorrow and whispered in my ears....If you love me...Introduce me to Peter !! Hahahaha

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Boyfriend rushes home:


Boyfrnd rushes home:
Pack ur bag honey,.
I've won $10 Million in a lottery.
GF:Wow! Now
London or Switzerland?
BF:Who Cares?
U jst pack ur bag &
GET LOST..

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Always remember:


Always remember:
When SHE cancels a date, it is because.."SHE HAS TO"

But When HE cancels a date, it is because..
"HE HAS TWO"

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Every girl has a misconception about her first kiss with her BoyFriend


Every girl has a misconception about her first kiss with her BoyFriend
As a matter of fact,
she believes that while d kiss is on, d guy thinks in his mind,'oh my god..she's so beautiful..so vulnerable..so soft'.
However, d truth lies in d fact that he is thinking,
should i use my hands now or wait for d next time... ;)

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Difficult to understand Girls


Difficult to understand Girls
Few day's back when she called me i was having my food....she got angry that i didn't asked her to join me..

Today when she called i was taking my bath n i asked her to join, she was angry again!!..

Difficult to understand girls..

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For years he thought he was damn good in bed,


For years he thought he was damn good in bed,
till he found out
his girlfriend had asthma !

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Best break up line by a girl:


Best break up line by a girl:

" wanna see magic ? "

Boy:"yes sure"

Girl:"POOF you are single !!!"

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You are said to be stupid


You are said to be stupid
when you visit an ice cream parlor instead of a chemist when your girlfriend says ''i love chocolate flavor'' :p

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A broken lover emotional line turned in a joke by his friends


A broken lover emotional line turned in a joke by his friends
Lover- I want her back :(


Friends- and what about her front ? :p

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Gal: What do you think about our love?


Gal: What do you think about our love? Boy: Try to count the stars in the sky
Gal: Awwww....It's infinite?!


Boy: No bitch! It's a waste of time