what is Difference between a man buying a lottery & a man arguing with his wife/girlfriend ?


Ans.  A man buying a lottery has a chance to win !!

$1 Million ring can do wonders for you!!

A Boy with a hot Girl entered in a jewellery shop & chose a ring worth $1 Million for her..
Gave a check & said he will collect ring on Monday after the check is cleared..
On Monday jeweler called boy: "There's no money in your account.."
Boy: "I know...... But can u imagine what a weekend I had..!!"

Man in bar: 1 large VODKA please.
Barman: $1, Sir
Man: What? Only 1? Can I have some kebabs please ?
Barman: Here Sir, $1
Man: Wow, that's real cheap, Can I meet the owner?
Barman: no sir, he is busy with my Girlfriend.
Man: what is he doing with your Girlfriend?
Barman: the same that I am doing to his business here..!:)

Last Thursday was my birthday.
My wife n kids didn't wish me.
I went 2 work,my friends dint wish me.
I entered my cabin, my Secretary said happy birthday boss.
I felt special !
She asked me for lunch.
After lunch she invited me 2her apartment. There she said, do u mind if i go to my bedroom for a minute?
Ok i said nervously. She came out few minutes after with a large cake
Followed by my wife ,kids & friends

& i was sitting there..

NAKED......!!!!!

Wife:-
Whenever I sing classical why do you stand in balcony?

Husband:-
 To ensure that our neighbors don't think, I'm not doing it forcibly..

A woman and her lover are in bed together when hubbie comes home. The woman jumps up, shaves the guy in a corner of the bedroom, rubs him down in baby oil and covers him in talcum powder.

'Don't move! You're a statue!'

The husband comes up to the bedroom and inquires about the new decoration. The wife explains that the Smith family next door acquired a statue for their bedroom recently, and if they could get one, so could she.

The married couple go to bed, but at midnight the husband goes downstairs, gets a glass of milk and some cookies, and comes back upstairs. He hands the snack to the statue and says, "Here. I stood around for 3 days at the Smiths', and they never fed me a thing!"

Date sheet of valentine weeks :D :D
7 Feb Rose Day
8 Feb Propose Day
9 Feb Chocolate Day
10 Feb Teddy Day
11 Feb Promise Day
12 Feb Kiss Day
13 Feb Hug Day
14 Feb VALENTINE's DAY
15 Feb Slap Day
16 Feb Kick Day
17 Feb Perfume Day
18 Feb Flirting Day
19 Feb Confession Day
20 Feb Missing Day
21 Feb Break Up

*If You Are In Love:
-Get The Best Of It
-Forget The Bad Things
-Enjoy It Because Nothing Lasts Forever

*If You Just Broke Up:
-Never Cry! Remember That You Were Happy
-Never Stay Alone! Your Frinds Are There
-Hug More People
-Stop Listening To Music! It Only Make Things Worse..

*If You Are Single & Alone:
-Play, Play 'n Play! Noone Can Blame You
-Enjoy Every Opportunity
-Never Stop Lookin For Someone..!

Why Does 'CUPID' Never Grow Up . . .?

Because
It Symbolizes That Love Never Gets Old.

And

Why Does He Throws Arrows To The Heart?

To Remind Us That True Love Hurts ... "

Do you know that beside valentine day,
the whole week (infact 2 weeks) is dedicated for various purpose,
have a look at the list below:-

7 Feb Rose Day
8 Feb Propose Day
9 Feb Chocolate Day
10 Feb Teddy Day
11 Feb Promise Day
12 Feb Kiss Day
13 Feb Hug Day
14 Feb VALENTINES DAY
15 Feb Slap Day
16 Feb Kick Day
17 Feb Perfume Day
18 Feb Flirting Day
19 Feb Confession Day
20 Feb Missing Day
21 Feb Break Up